Riley came into this world smiling. Well, he probably cried at first, but I’m pretty sure once he started smiling, we were all blessed. His smile was contagious even as a little guy, he was called “Smiley Riley”. He was as easy as pie as a child. He was rarely in trouble and when he was, it was over stupid stuff like ditching class or grades. And the grades thing was stupid because he was super smart, but didn’t see the need to do the homework when he could ace the tests.
He stopped having his hair cut as a freshman and with my begging and pleading, he did trim it for his senior pictures…trim ONLY was the agreement. I loved his long hair. Riley beat to his own drum, he knew no strangers, and he went out of his way to share that smile and easy goin’ demeanor with others. Riley played guitar, piano, saxophone and tuba. He was a band kid and he tried choir his senior year. It was fun to watch him sing. He loved music and was very talented. He liked to discuss philosophy, psychology, religion, music, computers and he played chess at his home away from home, his favorite hang out, a local coffee shop where he left an impression on adults as well as his peers.
Riley decided to celebrate his 18th birthday by taking acid. I’ve seen something he wrote while in the euphoria of the acid trip and we know too well the aftermath of what happened when that acid trip went bad. The decision to try a drug ended his life. Riley was accepted to NAU, had a girlfriend he was over the moon about, had a family birthday celebration coming up, a grad party planned, a high school graduation to experience…all stopped in its tracks. I thought we were open and frank in our conversations about sex, drugs, school, girls. We actually had a long conversation about drugs only two days before the incident. He told me he wouldn’t go there, he said he knew better…..“Don’t worry, Mom,” he said.
He did go there even though he knew better. Teens think they are invincible. How do we change that? I do not know.
We do keep talking to our kids. We need to educate ourselves on this epidemic of drugs. Too many lives are lost daily to drugs and Yes they can get it- pot, heroine, acid, mushrooms, Xanax, Oxycontin, cocaine, Ecstasy, Adderall and so much more. There have been many stories in my inbox exactly like Riley’s almost to a “T”. There’s synthetic drugs out
there that sent a 14 year old wandering the streets naked, a grown man waking up in the ER with the last thing he remembers is smoking some pot the week before. He said it looked like pot, it smelled like pot yet blood work showed no THC – what the heck did he really smoke?
There’s plenty of adults and children dying from drug use. The pot your kids are smoking is laced with all kinds of crap. Did you know there are acid brownies? Hash cookies? Kids are putting drugs in vapor cigarettes and e cigarettes and in hookahs. How about Triple C’s? Triple C’s are (Coricidin Cough and Cold pills) the writer told me that her son was taking 20 at a time to hallucinate. Cough medicine that is sold for a little over $5 a box to anyone! These are the things kids are using to get high that is readily available to them. This mom got the pills pulled from her local Walmart store shelf by talking with the pharmacist and they are now only available from behind the counter.
The dealers are buying the drugs online. How scarey is this to you?
Talk to your kids about the dangers of drugs. Educate yourselves about what is out there. Teens are educating me on the drugs and what is out there so we need to get ahead. Maybe Riley’s story will sink in so that when that one moment of curiosity, peer pressure, opportunity comes for your child or relative or neighbor or friend’s kid (and it will)…. they will walk away, say No, choose to not go there knowing about a pretty cool kid that had a smile for just about everybody that died as a result of thinking he was going to have some fun.
I Love You, Riley.
I Love You, Riley 
My son, 16, was using pot daily. At one time he was using Triple C, he began to experiment with meth, spice and alcohol was thrown infor good measure. He was suicidal at one point, admitted to a behavior health center, he had homicidal thoughts towards me, all because of the drugs. Dad denied that there was a problem, he did for almost 2 years, “I’ll talk to him.” He said this all the time. He got long term suspended from school, he had a baggy with white powder, some pain killer he got from a friend, he was snorting it, though he denies this. One of the many frustrating parts, dad had a drug problem years ago, so I couldn’t understand how he didn’t see it, how he believed his son only did it once. I promise you, if you ever hear that, its a lie! A big FAT lie! We did counseling, drug testing, nothing worked. My son didn’t listen, wouldn’t listen, say he’d change, make promises…nothing. He was angry, crazy mood swings, yes teenagers have mood swings, but these were extreme. His dad finally said he was afraid to sleep at night, didn’t know what his son was doing. After 2 years of me raving like a lunatic, he began to see it. Another frustrating part, I couldn’t get my son admitted without dad’s consent, you see we have joing custody. The facilities would not consider us unless his dad would sign off on the paperwork. Dad refused.
Then one day, my son snapped! He was angry, out of control, had a knife, a big knife and was threatening to stab his dad with it, and threatening to hurt himself and me. I was home alone with him and watching my son or what looked like my son. I text his dad, and sister…call 911 now, he is making threats, holding a large knife. The police showed up, my son was arrested and taken to Durango. I know this sounds harsh, but it was the best thing that ever happened to him. One of the hardest days of my life, (and I’ve had a few) was watching my son walk into court in cuffs, hands and feet. I wanted to grab my son and hold him and say, “never mind, this is not what I wanted,” but I couldn’t. It makes me cry thinking of it. I told the judge, through tears, that my son needed to stay at Durango, he needed to be clean and the only way that was going to happen was if he stayed there. He was there for almost a month, we could only see him 2 days a week for an hour each. No touching, no hugging, nothing. In my mind all I could see was my sweet baby boy, white blonde hair, big ocean blue eyes, the little boy who loved to sit on my lap and say, “mommy, you smell good.” My heart broke.
The first visit, my son cried when he saw us, we cried, he apologized for his behavior, and took full responsibility. This was the first time in 2 years, he said, “I put myself here, its not your’s or dad’s fault, I did this.” I was shocked..I cried harder. Each visit after was the same, taking responsiblity for his actions, making plans, swearing he would never go back to Durango. A month later he was released, put on house arrest for a month, he had to wear the special ankle bracelet, couldn’t go anywhere. It was frustrating, but it worked. We went back he was released, but has a year probation, (could be released for good behavior) but he has mandatory drug testing, weekly at first then random, he has to stay in school (in AZ kids can drop out at 16, that’s another story, I won’t go there now.) he has community service, mandatory counseling, drug and anger management. He will be assinged a mentor to check up on him, help him find a job, be a big brother of sorts. He also has to visit adult court and see what happens when adults face a judge after breaking parole.
His charges were not drug related, but his behavior and actions were drug related, the basis for his behavior and actions. He has been off drugs for over 2 months now, and I see my son, he is back. Oh I see typical rolling of the eyes, the impatience teenagers have with parents, but the extreme mood swings are gone. He still swears he will never go back, he also has 45 days deferred Durango time and 8 weeks deferred ankle bracelet time. If he does what is expected he won’t go back, but if he messes up, he goes back.
My point in telling you this story, don’t look the other way, trust your instincts, if you think your child is using, they are. Check their room, and I mean everywhere, they are good at hiding the stuff. Check his backpack, text messages, facebook, twitter, and all the other social media. Look for the signs, lost interest in school, friends change, mood swings, they carry eye drops, red eyes, they don’t sleep, they carry lighters. If the other parent refuses to listen, go back to court and get emergency medical custody, I should have a long time ago. Get your child help, call the police, do what you need too, do what is needed to save their life! Are we out of the woods, I don’t know, but we are better off than we were 2 months ago! One day at a time. I am so thankful for the judge the presided over my son’s case, he listened to me, he heard me and we formed a partnership to save my son. I believe without a doubt, that if the judge did not listen or if I had not had the police called, one way or another I would have lost my son to drugs.
Talk to your kids, and talk some more, make them listen and if they don’t listen take drastic action!
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